How to have a drink without screwing up your diet

As a diet and fitness junkie, I am a bit of a calorie snob. Alcohol is one of the worst ways to rack up excess calories. It is also delicious. Over my few years of dealing with both dieting and drinking, I have found a few things that helped me be able to drink alcohol AND lose weight. Here are my tips:

• Beer is the least calorie dense alcohol you can have. A light beer typically has between 100 and 150 calories in a 12 ounce serving. Most domestic beer makers now produce smaller cans of their products, so that you can have a taste of your favorite beverage without overdoing it. The Miller Light 8 ounce can has only 64 calories in it.
• If you do have a mixed drink, remember to watch the portion of alcohol. Most liquors have about the same amount of calories - 90 to 100 a shot. It is also VERY important to remember what you mix it with. Avoid juice, syrups of any kind, regular soda and (for God's sake) ice cream or cream. Any diet soda is great in a mixer.
• Never EVER drink to get drunk. Not only will you be slamming glass after calorie-laden glass of alcohol, but drunkenness can also open the door to overdoing it with food. You won't be fully aware of stuffing your face, but the deed will already be done.
• Lastly, it's worth mentioning that it would be better if you consumed no more than one serving of alcohol per day...Possibly less than that. Alcohol does have antioxidants that can help you be heart healthy, but too much is decidedly bad for you.
  

We're not that dumb, Burger King.

As of late, I have been on a LARGE health kick, and it's paid off. I've lost some weight, and some pant sizes. I count calories to control my food intake, so I'm always on the lookout to find some new food item I can have at a fast food restaurant that won't screw up my entire day's food budget.

Imagine, however, that I were the majority of American children and "health-conscious" adults, and I saw a commercial for these:

They're called "Fresh Apple Fries". The only thing is that they're not fried, they have no dipping sauce, and they're JUST APPLES cut to look like fries. The sales pitch for these things is that children will love them because they look like the delicious french fries they grew up on, and adults will like them because they want to lose weight.
The American people in general don't want these. They didn't sprinkle them with anything, there's nothing special about them, they don't come with dip of any kind, and you could stop at the local grocery store to get an apple. I'm not saying that this isn't good as a fry replacement, but let's not use the word "fry" too liberally. This is setting everyone up for disappointment.
What's next, broccoli cheesecake? Spinach Whopper? As long as you can make it the same shape, it's ok right? Liars.